How to Keep Growing Up as an Adult

Discover

You are never too old or too young to discover new things about yourself and the big wide world we live in. A lot of people fall into the trap of living life passively and never reflecting onto themselves and taking the time to learn about who they actually are. Not just the practicalities like what interests you have, or what food you enjoy the most, but delving deeper into what makes you genuine, what you want from life and if you are getting it, how to be a good person etc. Many people live in denial about how ''good enough'' their lives seem to be. It's okay if you want to live in your own perfect bubble, but take the red pill - I dare you!

By all means, go ahead and learn new things about yourself in the form of taking up new hobbies or learning new skills. Meeting different kinds of people from all walks of life really changes your outlook as you can gain perspective and re-evaluative your own selfish ways and insecurities. I cannot recommend enough apps like meetup, which enable you to take that step of making new connections. Find something (or someone) that will inspire you; sort of like a muse. Find a role model, whether it's Abraham Lincoln, Sarah Kay, or your mum.

Meditate

Meditation can mean different things for different people. For me, it's that time of the day when nothing else matter but the organic feeling when I do something that inspires me. For me it's reading, song writing, or blogging. In those precious moments, I am able to set my mind free of any exterior distractions and any of my internal insecurities.

I am yet to do a week with no technology since I need it to work on my Instagram account, my blog and look up chords for songs to play on guitar...I know, excuses, excuses. But I've heard good things about it. Maybe I will limit the time I spend on my phone aimlessly scrolling through Facebook, getting frustrated with all the political posts, and getting jealous of how perfect others' lives seem compared to my own. I think that's a goal I will set myself - use my phone for entertainment, work, research, but not to encourage self-critiquing behaviours and thoughts.

Another thing I'd like to add is that I think we could all do with some nature. Connecting with Mother Nature enables us to heal and go back to those times when we were kids; care-free and excited for our next adventure in the wilderness of the forest, or park.

Create

We are not meant to be sitting down all day. We are, by nature, hunter-gatherers. We must do - in order to survive. Many people like to create with their hands - bodybuilding, sculpture, art, furniture refurbishing, knitting. Others like to create with their minds - writing, innovation, photography, telekinesis (joking of course). Whatever your natural instincts tell you, simply create. All great ideas must be executed, because if not, they will die inside you when you do. And then the world would never know. Many people are scared to create - they give excuses like they don't have enough time, resources or money. It's their loss if they wanna live in denial.

What do I mean by create? Well, it's open to interpretation. What is something you want to create but you've never really got around to doing yet? If something popped into your mind - thank God, there's still hope for humanity. If nothing came up, I'll give you a few ideas. Create something meaningful, personal, ambitious, something with potential, something small or something big. It could be creating a surreal painting of a bowl of fruit, running an Instagram account for missing people, or starting your own business. The possibilities are endless and they can only be yours. I can't tell you what to create. It has to be organic and be born from inside your heart.

Express

Express your emotions and numbness, insecurities and accomplishments, frustrations and joys. Express your sorrows, even when others don't understand them. How? One of my forms of expressions is writing - I write poems, songs, blog articles - both at work and as a hobby. Another form is music - I sing, play the guitar, compose music. Sometimes I do art - pastel drawings, oil and water colour paintings, as well as pencil and charcoal drawings. If you're not the creative type, there are other forms of expression such as dance, psychotherapy, fitness, photography, film-making, beauty and makeup. What's important is to remain human, and not bottle things up. Whatever you want to express - whether it's your darkness or joy, it matters that you express it.

Speaking of darkness, it's even more important to express the ''bad'' or ''evil'' parts of ourselves, because otherwise, when supressed, they become stronger and scarier. Most of my songs and poems are dark, and have been written when I was in a lot of emotional pain and suffering. Keeping those feelings to yourself will only make you fell ashamed and guilty, so let it out.

Plan

What keeps me going through the difficult times is having something to look forward to. This could be as small as seeing friends on the weekend, or as big as travelling Europe over the Summer. Get excited about the future, because it is so easy to get caught in the present and feel like you have no future. Plan your next creative project, a trip to the local bookshop, or a visit to a haunted house. Make sure you have something going for you, apart from the people around you. So many of us become dependant on others for happiness. Happiness should grow from within yourself - I know it's easier said than done. It's a process and it will take time. I am still on that journey and with the help of various types of therapy, self-reflection and taking care of my wellbeing, I know that I will get there.

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All photographs belong to Sarah Ann Loreth, a beautiful inspiration.

#howtogrow