The Beauty of Solitude

One of the biggest things we fear the most is being alone. Perhaps not with what the practicalities of that may involve, but the fear of never being understood or made to feel like our weird and complex selves are actually quite normal. We feel we need others to survive.

Since becoming single I have found myself desperately trying to make new connections in the most unnatural of ways. The Internet is a place for superficial connections that often leave us feeling more empty than we were to begin with. Hoping for a connection in the wrong place is arguably worse than never attempting one in the first place. The hope of possibility is addictive.

I propose a new way of looking at the situation. To get comfortable with oneself seems an impossible task but one I believe it can be achieved within a lifetime. To live slowly, is to live more completely. To not be bothered by unnecessary distractions, like notifications and emails, is a blessing we deny ourselves every single day.

When was the last time you sat and ate breakfast in complete, uninterrupted silence?

Or took a walk to the local nature reserve without your phone?

We are slaves to our distractions.

We often look down upon those who prefer their own company. Introversion is not necessarily the sexiest or most obvious trait one can possess. But perhaps it's one we often overlook. The ability to not need others is a way of survival in this ruthless culture of ghosting, superficiality and boredom.

It is assumed that those in our society who withdraw from social interaction must inherently be somehow different, or weird. Yet, perhaps we are envious of the freedoms they seem to possess with deciding their Friday night plans. We crave not to be dictated by the rules, yet the social repercussions of doing whatever we want in our own company seem too much to bare.

The power of solitude comes from the fact that we are the only ones who will ever truly understand ourselves. This thought can be both scary, yet comforting. It can feel reassuring to know that some of our deepest and darkest thoughts will never be spoken out loud. We might play with the idea of having a dialogue with ourselves, inside jokes only we understand and promises we keep to ourselves only.

Solitude means choosing inner peace with oneself. It is not the reaction to loneliness or abandonment, rather a conscious effort to seek introspection. It's a time of reflection and play. We can explore every corner of our mind or sit on a thought for hours at a time. It's not a luxury but a necessity, only then we can re-enter the world knowing ourselves a little bit better, and allow others to peek at our true selves, through a blanket of self-acceptance we could only have knitted behind closed doors.

Thank you for reading.

Angie